Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Before You Reunite With Ex Boyfriend Consider 3 Prequalify Factors

Vector image of two human figures with hands i...Image via WikipediaSeriously? Are you going to consider reuniting with your ex boyfriend? The idea seems quite exciting, doesn't it. Especially when both of you are recalling the good times you shared together. But hold the phone, you should definitely do some serious thinking before you decide to make that reunion.

Couples do successfully reunite and go on to have a very strong relationship after a breakup. However, other couples get back together for the wrong reasons. If you don't deal with and resolve the issues that led to the breakup of the relationship in the first place, then who's to say those issues won't resurface. It's right for you to want your rejuvenated relationship to be a success.

Look at these 3 prequalify factors for a lasting marital relationship, why not take the time to consider the following:

Heal old wounds

There was a reason, maybe several reasons why you and your lover broke up in the first place, correct? If so, has the issue or issues been resolved? If not, it is most likely that your relationship will fail again. This is a cold-hard fact but a true fact nun-the-less. You and your boyfriend must find a way to either deal with the problems that led to the breakup or you must jointly decide that the issues are no longer conflicts. Is it enough to simply have regrets about the relationship and how it ended? I think not, certain things must change and it is up to each of you to decide in agreement on which things will change.


Let loose of old expectations

Let's assume that you and your boyfriend decide to give the relationship another effort, you must treat it as a new relationship. Not as an extension of the old one. No, this doesn’t mean that you need to completely start from scratch. However, you will have to rebuild trust and friendship. You should both reassess your goals as a couple and work on creating a new life together, which will take tremendous dedication.

Don’t let emotions decide the reuniting question

Of course it can be a thrill to talk again with your ex again and you both may feel the euphoria of falling for each other once again. Yet allowing this feeling of being emotionally aroused to determine whether you and your boyfriend get back together could be a mistake. You need to think rationally about how a new relationship will be... without letting a flood of emotion overcome you. By the same token, when making decisions about the new beginning of the relationship, it is best to do so calmly, rationalize your thoughts with sound reason. In other words, if you allow emotions to cloud your judgment, you may come to regret it later on.

So, you really want to get back together with your boyfriend. Well, make sure that you and he are both ready for another try at a long lasting relationship. How can this be done, you ask? Make a list of  "do's and do nots", a list that both of you can agree with. Make it a binding contract just between you and him. By doing so, you could wind up saving yourself a great deal of heartache, because when all the pluses and minuses are out in the open or wrote down, it is easy to determine (for each partner) whether or not this relationship will take off and fly, amen?

Sure, it's easy to believe that your x boyfriend has changed because of your great desire to reunite with him. However, you won't know until you see proof of evidence. In other words, a positive change in his behavior towards you. If you have not or do not see any proof, you are setting yourself up for failure. Instead, set yourself up for success by being honest with your boyfriend and make sure the two of you do not follow the same path that led to your first breakup.

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Tuesday, February 9, 2010

5 Ways to Fix Your Broken Love Relationship

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Understanding, mural by Robert Lewis Reid. Sec...Image via WikipediaLove relationships run into problem areas. At some point in time your relationship no matter how good, will have issues. These matters can slowly be worked out.

However, some couples have larger disputes such as broken trust or a lack of zeal for one another. These issues are much more difficult to work through.

If you are searching for a way to mend your broken relationship, you must proceed with caution.

Make sure that you take these 5 necessary steps and begin to mend your broken love relationship.

Identify the Problem

When you don't know what the problem is, how can you fix it? So, the first tip in fixing a broken relationship is to identify the cause of the problem. Both partners need to have a complete understanding of the state of the relationship. If there was a specific event that caused the issue, both of you should understand how or why the issue surfaced. If it was a series of events, you must clearly define the issues and the cause. This will require communication!

Let Your Partner Know How You Feel

The second tip when mending your romantic relationship is to be honest and open about how you feel. A relationship can only work if there is substantial communication. You need to be open about how you feel. Be careful what you say and your tone of voice. Be calm, don't shout and just reason with your partner. No accusations or threats of any kind, this will just make matters worse. Reason involves discussing who, what, why, where, when and how of the problem and the possible solution. You don't have to sugar coat your feelings, just let them be known in a tactful manner.

Listen, you should let the other person in this relationship know how you really feel. Be as descriptive and tactful as you can. Are you angry? Confused? Sorry? Frantic? Disappointed? The more descriptive (not destructive or demanding) you can be, the more your partner will understand where you're coming from.

Remember, it is vital that you show some sensitivity here, otherwise you'll have a huge argument instead of a rational conversation.

Can You Afford to Pay Attention?

Be sure to pay attention to how they feel as well. It's a two way street, so listen to how descriptive they are about their feelings as well. Ask penetrating and specific questions to better understand how they feel. By doing so you will comprehend the root of the primary problem. Missing the root of the problem makes a permanent solution unlikely. If you have ever weeded a garden, then you know what I mean.

Give Small Gifts

Small gifts can be a perfect way to start to mend a broken relationship. While it will not fix everything, it will show that you care, and that you are thinking of them.

Small Meaningful Dates

Going on small, inexpensive but fun dates can also be beneficial. Having fun together is the perfect way to mend broken hearts and a broken relationship. Laughter really is the best medicine for what ales you.

It is essential to make sure that you both fully understand the issue at hand. IF you are working on repairing a broken relationship, you must be on the same page as your partner. Be open about how you feel about the situation, and what you think can help it. Remember who, what, why, where, when and how? And be sure to pay attention to what he/she has to say as well.

When you are certain that both of you are on the same frequency, pay attention to the little things. Small gifts, small dates and especially gifts or dates with sincere meaning are an excellent way to mend a relationship. You could remind yourselves why you are in the relationship. These 5 tips will help you achieve your goal to fix a broken relationship.



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Friday, January 8, 2010

10 Romantic Ways to Reunite With X After a Breakup

reuniting after a breakup/image.jpg These 10 romantic or fun ways to reunite after a breakup are what many young couples do as they begin to fall in love with each other. One of these just might help you get back together and enhance your relationship.

But listen, there's no guarantee any of these will work 100% of the time. You probably know your ex partner better than anyone else, so you know which tips might be more in line with their personality.



  • Send a bouquet. Whether it's flowers or a balloon bouquet, if you time this right this can help you make a real romantic impression.
  • Send a card that opens to a song or a line from a TV show or movie that really suits your ex. Whether it's for a birthday or a holiday. Choose a funny, sweet or romantic card to make the day special.
    • Buy a box of chocolates and very carefully open one side of the plastic wrap so as to gently slide the box out. Open the box and place a love note inside. Then slide the box back into its plastic wrap and reseal it.
      • On a special occasion, buy your ex eleven real red roses and one artificial red rose. Place the artificial rose in the center of the bouquet. Attach a card that reads... "I will love you until the last rose fades."
        • Invite her to go for a walk. Get a backpack and pack these items: A picnic blanket, a selection of fruit in a small container (strawberries, watermelon, kiwi and grapes). Bring cheese and crackers as well. Also bring a small bottle of champagne and two plastic champagne glasses. If she asks, "What's in the back pack" just say, "A jacket and some lunch”. Find a romantic spot and ask if she would like something to eat. Open your backpack and remove the items one by one to set up your picnic. The last items removed should be the champagne and two glasses.
          • Ask your ex to join you on a spa date. This works very well when your ex is a female. Make an appointment for both of you to have your hair cut, your nails done and maybe even a massage. Doing it together is a fun way to have time to talk and just relax.
            • Ask your ex out on a theme date. Eat spaghetti and watch The Lady and the Tramp. Eat hamburgers, fries and shakes and watch American graffiti. The point is to plan something fun and lighthearted.
              • Take your ex with you to an animal shelter and spend an afternoon walking the dogs and playing with the cats.
                • Go to the amusement park together. Ride the scariest rides and have your pictures taken with your faces sticking in the holes of those wooden cutouts that make you look goofy. Have fun without pressure on your ex about getting back together.
                  • Re-create your first date. This is a good choice when things are going well and you feel like getting back together is within your grasp.
                    One of these romantic ideas is sure to give you both an enjoyable time together and improve your chances of reuniting after a breakup.



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                    Friday, November 6, 2009

                    How to Improve Your Chances of Reuniting After a Breakup

                    getting back together,reuniting after a breakup,reunite after breakup/image.jpg So how do you improve the chances of reuniting after a breakup? After all, you deserve a second chance, right? Communication is the key, lay all the cards on the table. Resolve the conflict A.S.A.P, because all too often, couples split for silly reasons. With communication skills you can overcome the problems and regain a blissful relationship.

                    The truth of the matter is this. Your relationship has fallen apart. This means that your partner has voluntarily chose to end their association with you. What you must do is convince your partner to... not only  reverse their decision but to also voluntarily take it all the way back to the type of relationship you had before the trouble started.

                    For a lot of people, that takes a big shift in their way of thinking. This is why pushiness is not going to work. Slowly turn your ex partner's opinion by changing the things about yourself that made them lose interest with you in the first. This is how it works but you have to take the right approach.

                    Before You and Your Ex Get Back Together

                    Many couples do successfully reunite and end up with very strong relationship after a breakup. However, some couples end up reuniting for the wrong reasons. If you don't deal with and resolve the issues that led to the breakup of the relationship in the first place, then who's to say those issues won't surface again. If you want your rejuvenated relationship to be a success, take a quick look at "5 Ingredients for a Lasting Marital Relationship" and be sure to come back here, because we're not finished yet.

                    What's the Goal You're Trying to Achieve

                    Your goal here is to make your ex look at you with interest once again, right? Until your ex looks at you with interest again, you are not going to reunite with him/her. They need to be interested, just as they were the first time they fell in love with you. Does this make sense?

                    Make Up Your Mind and Go For It!

                    At this point in time, you have probably made your decision whether or not to reunite with this person. Forget about what they want just for a moment and concentrate on what you would like. That’s just for starters. Once you are certain about getting back together, you will be much more convincing as you persuade the other person to give you a 2nd chance.

                    If you have decided that you do not want to reunite with your ex partner you should have no problem getting over the breakup. But I have a suspicion that you are not willing to let that relationship go just yet, are you?

                    Listen, you should set up a meeting with your ex (after things have settled down) to discuss the future and forget the past. Apologize for anything that went wrong, whether it was your fault or not. You must agree to put the transgressions in the past, because there is no future in the past. Indeed, you do need to resolve the issues but don't dwell on them.

                    Think Positive

                    Here's the story... You must focus on the positives. What sort of positive properties do you have going for you? Why should the two of you be together? Talk about the great times you have had, the history you share and what's more, the sexual attraction you have for each other. Hopefully you will be celebrating a reunification very soon!

                    It may take a couple of meetings and some time to get back on track but it will be worth it. If you had a great relationship, isn't it worth fighting for. Finding someone to love and one whom also loves you in return doesn't happen every day. Sure, you have a shared history, family, children and you will soon realize, if you haven’t already done so, that these are good reasons as to why the two of you belong together.

                    What Was the Main Reason For Breaking Up and Can This Issue Be Resolved

                    Perhaps one of you had an affair, was that the reason for your breakup? This doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship must come to an end. Affairs do happen for one reason or another. Possibly you were not paying enough attention to your partner. Perhaps they felt as though they had been taken for granted.

                    But wait, there's more. What ever the reason may have been, try and resolve the problem. You can then start moving forward with a much stronger relationship. Approach the situation with an open mind.

                    5 Tips to Fixing a Broken Relationship

                    To have someone you love in your life is far too important to let it go. Keep this in mind… “The nose of a bulldog is slanted backward so he can continue to breath without letting go” (Winston Churchill). So concentrate on reuniting after breaking up with the love of your life and get that relationship back on track.

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